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Masturbating While Driving Is Disturbingly Popular

Masturbating While Driving Is Disturbingly Popular

Masturbating While Driving Is Disturbingly PopularMany of us have been guilty of texting, talking, eating, or even personal grooming at the wheel. But for young dudes, there's another shockingly prevalent source of driving distraction: masturbation.

Human males not only masturbate more than other apes, they're also the only animals capable of jacking it while driving. And they apparently take full advantage of this ability. (With or without the sunroof open.) When scientists watched male drivers under 30 (it's not entirely clear how they made their age determinations, or whether they were better at it than bartenders) at two intersections — one in New York and one in Florida — they found that 11% of the guys "had one hand on their crotches and moving them." Now I'm sure that some of these guys were just adjusting, but if I'm reading the study press release right, it's not just that over a tenth of dudes have masturbated behind the wheel at some point in their lives. Rather, a full 11% of the young male drivers who arrived at the intersections in question were doing something that looked a lot like whacking. Which, by my extremely scientific extrapolation, means way more dudes (and ladies too?) have done this deed while driving and not been caught by eagle-eyed scientists. Do tell, fellows.

Image via Evstigneev Alexander/Shutterstock.com.

Related: Remember To Close Your Sunroof When Masturbating [Jalopnik]

Major Accident Cause: 11% Of Male Drivers Under 30 Distracted By Fondling Themselves While Driving [Yahoo! News via The Sexist]
One Reason Why Humans Are Special And Unique: We Masturbate. A Lot. [Scientific American]

Send an email to Anna North, the author of this post, at annanorth@jezebel.com.

 

Today's WTF report!

Entire rugby team arrested after female player is run over by lawn roller as she slept in tent

Entire rugby team arrested after female player run over by lawn roller as she slept in tent

By Daily Mail Reporter
Last updated at 9:05 PM on 30th August 2009

A rugby team has been suspended from a tournament after a heavy-duty lawn roller was rolled over a woman as she slept in a tent.

Emma Winch, 26, was left with head injuries following the incident at about 1am on Saturday morning.

She was resting in advance of a youth ladies rugby tournament in Aberaeron, west Wales.

Emma Winch was hit by the metal lawn mower as she slept

Emma Winch was hit by the metal lawn roller as she slept

Police arrested 21 men, all youth players from the Merthyr Tydfil area, following the incident.

Ms Winch, a female rugby player, was due to take part in the youth ladies rugby tournament in Aberaeron yesterday.

Aberaeron Rugby Club has been hosting a Festival of Sevens tournament since Thursday with the main men's event taking place today.

Glyndwr Evans, the club secretary, confirmed today that the Merthyr Tydfil youth team has since been dismissed from the tournament.

A Dyfed-Powys Police spokesman said: 'In the early hours of Saturday the 29th of August, police were called to an incident in Aberaeron.

'It transpired that a large metal lawn roller used on the rugby grounds had been rolled over a tent whilst a 26-year-old female occupant from a visiting rugby team was sleeping.

'Paramedics attended and the female was initially taken to Bronglais Hospital in Aberystwyth. Later she was transferred to Morriston Hospital in Swansea with head injuries.

'As a result of inquiries 21 males from the Merthyr area were arrested and have all been bailed pending police inquiries.'

Emma had been due to take place in the 7-a-side rugby tournament taking place in Aberaeron, West Wales this weekend

Emma had been due to take place in the 7-a-side rugby tournament taking place in Aberaeron, West Wales this weekend